{"id":588945,"date":"2019-08-21T12:59:00","date_gmt":"2019-08-21T16:59:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/joangarry.com\/?p=588945"},"modified":"2022-07-02T11:05:34","modified_gmt":"2022-07-02T15:05:34","slug":"work-less","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/joangarry.com\/work-less\/","title":{"rendered":"Stop Feeling Guilty For Wanting to Work Less"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A nonprofit executive director client of mine is headed out for vacation next week.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Re-read that sentence if you don\u2019t mind. Note that the word \u201cexecutive director\u201d and \u201cvacation\u201d appear in the same sentence. <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Without<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> the word <\/span><b><i>cancel.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So we are headed in the right direction. Then I ask the key question. \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Will you be checking your email while you are out of the country?\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The answer is pretty typical: \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Maybe just a few times a day, but that\u2019s all. I&#8217;ll definitely work less.\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Like I was supposed to offer a round of applause. Like \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">that\u2019s all<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201d is evidence of a remarkable commitment to self care.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">She received no applause from me.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cThat\u2019s all.\u201d Let\u2019s tease that out, shall we?&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That\u2019s all\u2026 Because I don\u2019t trust anyone else to take care of things?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That\u2019s all\u2026 Because I have to demonstrate that I work really hard all the time?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That\u2019s all\u2026 Because I\u2019m a \u201cpleaser\u201d who has <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/joangarry.com\/my-boss-cant-say-no\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">trouble saying \u201cno\u201d<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That\u2019s all\u2026 Because just the thought of focusing on my own well-being makes me feel tremendous guilt?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I\u2019m going to dive into this issue \u2013 this sense of guilt so many nonprofit leaders have about any kind of self-investment. I<\/span><span style=\"font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, 'Segoe UI', Roboto, Oxygen-Sans, Ubuntu, Cantarell, 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif;\">t\u2019s time for some tough love from Joan.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<h2>WHY CAN\u2019T YOU TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF?<\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Imagine a plane full of nonprofit leaders. In every seat an executive director. Some crazy turbulence causes the masks to come down.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I\u2019m laughing as I write this. NO ONE would be able to put on their own mask! There\u2019d be this crazy scene where everyone would be trying to help everyone else put their masks on.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Would everyone wind up with a mask? I sure hope so, but what a scene it would be. <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cHere, let me help you!\u201d \u201cNo no! Let me help YOU!\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<h2>STOP FEELING GUILTY<\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Let\u2019s imagine another one of those plane rides where the masks drop down above our seat.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do you think the pilot\u2019s mask dropped down?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What would you like the pilot to do? The answer is so freakin\u2019 easy. \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">OMG Please get that mask on!!!!!!\u201d&nbsp;<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do you want the pilot to have had a good night\u2019s sleep before flying you across the country?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do you want the pilot to take courses regularly to learn about what is new since she went to flight school 15 years ago?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do you want the pilot to have a bit of training on how to speak publicly to the travelers on board to communicate confidence, make those aboard feel comfortable, especially if the ride gets bumpy.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">YOU are a pilot. I rest my case.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2>14 WONDERFUL WAYS TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF<\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I focused on vacations above, but I mean more than that. I mean <\/span><b><i>investing in yourself.<\/i><\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here are a list of items that represent what \u201cinvesting in yourself\u201d looks like:<\/span><\/p>\n<ol>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Take a one or (gasp!) two week vacation<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Take a one or (gasp!) two week vacation where you do not check email<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Have a lunch or dinner with a nonprofit leader colleague in your sector to share best practices<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sign up for an online course on how to become a better fundraiser<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Read a book on how to be a better leader<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Offer advice to a colleague E.D. reminding you of your skills and expertise<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Read an article online about how to engage and motivate volunteers<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Find a pro bono resource in your community to attend your board meeting to educate all of you on how to use social media to be more effective organizational ambassadors<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Attend a conference to network with other leaders for education and to build a sense of community<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Take your staff out for drinks after work<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Leave work early not because you have an appointment outside the office. Just because.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Schedule and show up for all of your annual health check-ups<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Read a good old fashioned page turner of a novel<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Take a really nice long bath<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Which have you done in the last 12 months?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I\u2019m guessing there are way too many items that are screaming, \u201cCHECK ME, CHECK ME!!!!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<h2>YOU CAN DO THIS. YOU HAVE TO DO THIS.<\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">OK my friend. You get it right? <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There are no excuses. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Professional development is not a time bandit. It\u2019s an investment.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Leaving the office early to make dinner for your spouse isn\u2019t abandoning ship; it\u2019s investing in your relationship &#8211; and that is good for your spouse AND you.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Coming in late because you are in the audience of a student assembly where your kid is singing? That <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">feeds <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">your soul.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A class on how to be a better leader will <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">enrich<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> you, make you feel like a more responsible executive director.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cocktails with other leaders in your community will make you feel less alone.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Reading a great novel takes you somewhere else for a few hours, allowing you to come back to your work the next day with a slightly different set of eyes, a fresh perspective, and more creativity and focus. You\u2019ll simply be better at your job.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2>MY CLIENT\u2019S VACATION<\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We talked it all through. My client said she would give one of her staff members access to her email and ask if he could triage, addressing what he could, putting into folders things that could wait for her return and that they would agree on what qualified as a 911 situation that warranted a vacation interruption.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What if you tried something like that?<\/span><\/p>\n<h2>GO CHECK A FEW BOXES<\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I totally get it. Sometimes it feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. And there are days when it feels true. I want your shoulders to be good and strong.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I hope I hope I hope that this post motivates you to go check a box you couldn\u2019t check before. In the comments below, let me know something you did to invest in yourself.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And unlike my client who expected applause for only checking email three times a day while on vacation (applause she didn\u2019t get), each of you who leave a comment? Imagine an auditorium filled with clients, donors, community leaders and your staff &#8211; offering you a standing ovation.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There are no excuses. Professional development is not a time bandit. Self care is not a time bandit. They are investments.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":590078,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[15,16,18],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-588945","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-board","category-ceo","category-senior-staff"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.9 (Yoast SEO v24.9) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Stop Feeling Guilty For Wanting to Work Less<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"There are no excuses. Professional development is not a time bandit. Self care is not a time bandit. 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